Butterbeer

 

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INTRODUCTION

In your search for Butterbeer recipes you’ll find no shortage of strange concoctions that call for weird elements such as cream soda, root beer, etc. None of these, however, are quite right because they fail to recognise certain essential properties that Butterbeer must satisfy.


  1. (1)Butterbeer is a drink with an alcoholic content that is low enough not to get students drunk, but it is still capable of getting a house elf drunk and it lowers inhibitions. So any recipes that contain no alcohol can be ruled out.

  2. (2)Butterbeer is served both cold and hot. So any recipes that have different versions for cold and hot can be ruled out.

  3. (3)And finally, Butterbeer is British. So non-British elements such as cream or club soda can be ruled out.


Now, there is only one liquid that can used as base from which to build Butterbeer that satisfies all of these three characteristics. And that is apple cider!


To illustrate:

           Root Beer    Cream Soda    Club Soda    Cider*

    1          Yes                No                    No             Yes

    2           No                No                    No             Yes

    3           No                No                    No             Yes


*As a mix of hard and soft cider


[It is also worth noting that Ginger Beer might also satisfy these three characteristics, but it is not a modification that we have tested]



RECIPE

Supplies: [For measurements, trial and error]

Apple Cider

Strongbow (or your preferred hard cider)

Butterscotch syrup

Whipping Cream


DIRECTIONS

Pour in as much apple cider as you need based on how much Butterbeer you wish to make.










Next, add the Strongbow (or preferred hard cider) based on how alcoholic you want to make the Butterbeer. Then add the butterscotch until the taste starts to resemble what you imagine Butterbeer would taste like.










Finally, add the whipping cream until it’s roughly the right colour of Butter (and taste again to make sure it doesn’t dilute the taste, and if it does - add more butterscotch!). Then whisk away!









And the final result should look something like the first picture!


Enjoy!

(If the end result tastes so sweet it feels like your teeth are going to fall out, then you’ve done everything right.)

 
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